90 Important Questions to Ask Your Online Long Distance Boyfriend
You have an online long distance boyfriend but you can’t meet in person because the distance is too much. We totally get it! Been there, done that. And let me tell you, it is not easy.
Navigating a long-distance relationship, especially one that started online, can be extremely challenging. Especially knowing that statistically speaking these relationships never go far and are well known to be very brief.
However, asking the right questions can help build trust, understanding, and a strong foundation for the future just like any other relationship if you take it seriously.
Here’s a comprehensive list of questions you should be asking your long distance boyfriend at any stage in your relationship. That way you and your online boyfriend connect deeply and meaningfully. These questions have been a great help for building strong communication in our own online long distance relationship, and we hope it offers the same for you!
Why should you be asking these questions?
Building a strong connection with someone you’ve met online and maintaining a long-distance relationship requires more than just talking with them everyday. You have to really know this person more than you would need to if you knew them in person. You should know who you’re really talking with online.
LDR relationships with couples who have been together before the distance have their own struggles when it comes to distance. But imagine the level of difficulty for an online couple who has never met in person before.
It involves communicating each other’s values, dreams, and experiences. You have to really know your online long distance boyfriend on another level. This guide provides essential questions to build deep conversations and create an understanding between you and your long distance boyfriend.
Questions for the start of an online relationship:
Future Goals and Aspirations:
- What do you see for your future?
- What are your top three life goals?
- If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?
- What is your dream job, and what steps are you taking to achieve it?
- Do you think you’ll ever want to go back to school?
- How do you see yourself in 10 years? 20 Years?
- What do you think about having kids?
- What do you think about long term relationships?
Values and Beliefs:
- What family values are most important to you?
- What do you value most in your own life?
- How do you define success? What gives you ultimate satisfaction in life?
- If you had all the money in the world, what would you do with it?
- What are your beliefs and values when it comes to family and relationships?
- What are the main moral principles that guide your decisions?
- How much do you prioritize yourself over others?
Lifestyle Preferences:
- What is absolutely necessary to have in your life in the future?
- What hobbies or activities are essential to your happiness?
- Do you prefer socializing with family/friends or spending time alone?
- Do you prefer a busy city life or a quiet countryside lifestyle?
- What role does health and fitness play in your daily routine?
- Are you an organized or disorganized person?
- Do you smoke or drink? How often?
- Do you like to cook? How often do you like to cook for yourself?
Family and Friends:
- What kind of people do you like to have in your social circle?
- How do you usually make friends?
- How important is family to you? What do you do for them on a regular basis and how often do you communicate with them?
- How do your friends and family influence your decisions?
- Have you told your family about me? When will you tell your family about me?
- How do you keep the relationships in your life close and dear to you?
Questions after a couple of months of dating:
Personal Experiences:
- What is the most memorable experience of your childhood?
- What has been your biggest achievement so far?
- What has been your biggest challenge in life? And how did you overcome it?
- What is a life lesson you’ve learned the hard way?
- What’s the most adventurous thing you’ve ever done?
Have you ever questions:
- Have you ever been in a long-distance relationship before? How did it go?
- Have you ever cheated in a relationship? Have you ever been cheated on?
- Have you ever had to end a relationship, and what was the reason?
- Have you ever been arrested for a crime?
- Have you ever cheated on a test?
- Have you ever gotten in a fist fight before?
- Have you ever been in an abusive or manipulating relationship before? What happened?
- Have you ever failed to follow through on a promise?
- Have you ever bullied or been bullied as a kid?
- Have you ever held a grudge for a long time?
- Have you ever made a significant lifestyle change for someone you love?
Questions for communication:
- What is your relationship history? How have your relationships affected or changed you as a person?
- What makes you feel truly loved and appreciated?
- How do you express your emotions when you’re happy, sad, or angry? Will you let me know? What are some of the queues?
- What are your thoughts on forgiveness and moving on from the past?
- Is there anything you won’t be able to forgive me for?
- How do you handle stress and anxiety?
- What is your greatest fear, and how do you cope with it?
Relationship Dynamics:
- What do you believe is the key to a successful relationship?
- What do you want from our relationship? How do you see us in the future?
- How do you prefer to communicate in a relationship?
- What are your expectations from me in terms of support and companionship?
- How do you handle conflicts in a relationship?
- What does trust mean to you, and how is it built? What boundaries should we build in our relationship to feel safe with each other?
- What does long term mean for our relationship? After answering these questions do you feel assured that we belong together for the long term? If not, what are you concerned about for our future and how can we fix it?
Some Scenario Questions:
- If you caught your friend cheating on your other friend what would you do?
- If you found out that your best friend was spreading rumors about you, how would you handle it?
- If a close friend asked you to lie for them, what would you say?
- If you found a wallet with a large amount of money and the owner’s ID inside, what would you do?
- If you saw someone stealing from a store, would you report it? Why or why not?
- If you accidentally received too much change at a store, what would you do?
- If you saw a homeless person asking for help, what would you do?
- If you witnessed someone being bullied, what action would you take?
- If a friend was going through a tough time and needed emotional support, how would you help them?
- If you had to choose between a high-paying job you dislike and a low-paying job you love, which would you choose and why?
- If you had an opportunity to move to a new city for a dream job but had to leave your family and friends behind, what would you do?
- If you could only save one item in your house during a fire, what would it be and why?
- If you were offered a promotion that required relocating, but your partner couldn’t move, what would you do?
- If you saw someone being treated unfairly in public, how would you respond?
- If you could spend a day helping any organization, which one would you choose and what would you do?
Other Questions to Ask:
Fun and Lighthearted Questions:
- What is your favorite way to spend a weekend?
- If you could meet any historical figure, who would it be and why?
- What is one thing you’ve always wanted to try but haven’t yet?
- What are some things on your bucket list?
- What’s your favorite book, movie, or TV show, and why?
- If you could have any superpower, what would it be and why?
- What would your ideal vacation look like?
- If you could relive one day from your past, which day would it be and why?
- What would you do if you won the lottery tomorrow?
- If you could instantly learn any skill, what would it be?
Future Relationship Questions:
- How do you envision our future together?
- What are your thoughts on marriage?
- What are your thoughts on moving to a different city or country for a partner?
- How do you plan to make our relationship work despite the distance?
All these questions for long distance online dating will make both you and your partner feel safe in your online relationship. You cannot forget to take other measures of safety though! Make sure that you video call your online partner regularly and send each other plenty of pictures, audio notes, and videos so that you can really get to know one another, and have a true trust for each other.
Long-distance online relationships can be deeply rewarding with the right approach and understanding. Keep the conversations open and honest, and remember that every relationship is unique so you need to build this trust in your own way. But use these questions as a guide for trust and companionship with your long distance online partner.
Maeve & Kart
Ram ram!
We’re Maeve & Kart – an introverted American girl with a love for letters, flowers, and chai on one side, and an introverted extrovert nature enthusiast Indian boy with a sweet tooth on the other.
Get yourself a cup of tea and a spoonful of chini and settle in.
We write for all aspiring travelers, folks in long distance and multicultural relationships, and those kindred spirits out there looking for advice on life in India as a foreigner.
As an American/Indian couple, we are currently living together in India in a cross cultural relationship as a result of one of few successful long distance love stories.
Come along with us as we share stories and advice on multicultural discussions, long distance relationships, and the beauty of travel.
Maeve & Kart
Our Long Distance Story
We are Maeve and Kart – a long distance married couple from America and India.
To all kindred spirits out there trying to navigate a multicultural or a long distance relationship, you’re not alone. Learn from our own experiences of how we finally found each other from across the world and remain together living with a blend of both cultures and languages.
Get a cup of tea and a spoonful of chini and take in the advice from those who have successfully created a strong cross-cultural relationship from a distance.
Come along with us for the journey
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About Us
We're Maeve and Kart – an introvert with a love for letters, flowers, and chai on one side, and an introverted extrovert nature enthusiast with a sweet tooth on the other. Get yourself a cup of tea and a spoonful of chini and settle in. To all aspiring travelers, folks in long distance and multicultural relationships, and those kindred spirits out there looking for advice on life in India as a foreigner - consider this place your sanctuary. As an American/Indian couple, we are currently living together in India in a cross cultural relationship as a result of one of few successful long distance love stories. Our journey is unique, and we're here to share insights and advice for anyone in similar circumstances. Come along with us as we share stories and advice on multicultural discussions, long distance relationships, and the beauty of travel.
